No, she’s not competing, but the girl has earned a win.
Here’s how it has to go down: EXT. Barcelona – Sunset. It’s the final bout of prestigious biannual karate tournament the Sekai Taikai, and the spectators are gripped more tightly than both of John Kreese’s lapels. Following a gruelling number of punches and character-arc-specific flashbacks, one of the 30-year-olds who play Cobra Kai’s teen karate champions slow-mo kicks their opponent off the top of the Sagrada Familia and in so doing, learns an improving lesson about friendship and self-esteem.
The trophy is buffed, the victor’s arm is raised in celebration, and then… a wave of phone alerts sound. Everybody scrambles for their screens to find out what’s happening and word spreads fast: it’s the pope. He’s issued a Papal bull using Vatican privilege to override the result and to crown a winner who wouldn’t know a kata if one bit her on the ass. That’s right: Amanda LaRusso is the new Sekai Taikai champion.
The crowd erupts in whoops and cheers, Amanda dips Johnny Lawrence and plants one on him like that sailor planted one on that nurse in the V-J Day photo; Carmen’s into it and slips Amanda their hotel room key for later; and Daniel misses the whole thing because he’s crouched by a vending machine giving busy little kisses to a photograph of Mr Miyagi that he keeps in his wallet.
Justice! Recognition, at last, for Cobra Kai’s greatest and least-sung character: all hail Amanda LaRusso. Pour that woman a large white wine.
She’ll already have one, because a fishbowl of Sauvignon Blanc is Amanda’s signature accessory – presumably to wash down all the Valium she requires to stay married to the Karate Kid.
For six seasons of Cobra Kai, Amanda LaRusso has been the sole grown-up in the San Fernando Valley. After what was presumably a decade or two in which her car dealer husband did all the normal over-40s stuff (watching documentaries about the Roman Empire, getting moles checked by the doctor…) one day, his brain went ping and his every waking thought became dominated by the martial art of – Ross Geller pronunciation – karate.
